Bringing an end-of-life doula into your life, or the life of someone you love, is a deeply personal decision. Because the role is new, unregulated and varies enormously from one practitioner to the next, there’s no single job description to compare candidates against. The best way to find the right fit is to ask good questions upfront, before you’re relying on that relationship during an already difficult time.

Here’s a practical guide to what’s worth asking.

Start with training and experience

End-of-life doula is not a registered or regulated profession in Australia. Anyone can call themselves a doula, so it’s worth understanding exactly what stands behind the person you’re considering.

• What training have you completed, and with which organisation?
• How long have you been practising, and how many people have you supported?
• Do you belong to a professional body, such as Holistic End of Life and Deathcare Australia (HELD), and do you follow a code of conduct?
• Do you have any other relevant background (nursing, social work, counselling, pastoral care) that shapes how you work?
• Do you undertake any ongoing professional development or supervision?

None of this makes one doula “more legitimate” than another: many experienced doulas come from lived experience rather than formal qualifications, but it helps you understand their frame of reference.

Clarify exactly what they do, and don’t do

Because the role isn’t standardised, two doulas can offer very different services under the same title. Get specific.

• What does a typical engagement with you look like, from first contact through to after the death?
• What do you not provide? (Most doulas are clear that they don’t administer medication, provide nursing care, or make medical decisions.)
• Do you offer vigil support, sitting with the dying person and family through the final hours or days?
• Can you help with legacy work, such as memory books, letters or recordings?
• Do you support practical after-death tasks, like liaising with a funeral director or preparing the body at home, if that’s something the family wants?
• Do you support people considering voluntary assisted dying? (If that’s relevant to your situation.)

Ask how they work alongside medical and palliative care teams

A good doula complements clinical care rather than working around it.

• Have you worked alongside palliative care teams, community nurses or GPs before?
• How do you communicate with the clinical team, and how do you make sure everyone stays informed?
• What would you do if you noticed a change in the person’s condition that seemed to need medical attention?
• Are you comfortable if I want my palliative care nurse or doctor to be part of these conversations?

Talk through logistics and availability

Dying doesn’t follow a schedule, so practical questions matter more than they might seem to at first.

• What are your usual hours, and are you available for emergency or overnight calls?
• Do you work alone, or do you have a backup doula or team who can step in if you’re unavailable?
• Do you offer phone or video support if in-person visits aren’t possible, especially useful in regional or remote areas?
• How do you prefer to communicate day-to-day: phone, text, or email?

Get clear on fees and funding

Ask about cost early and in writing, since arrangements vary widely between practitioners.

• How do you charge: hourly, by package, or a flat fee for the full engagement?
• What’s included in vigil or overnight rates, and are there minimum booking times?
• Do you charge for travel, and how is that calculated?
• If I have an NDIS plan, would you be able to be engaged as a support worker under it?

It’s worth knowing that in Australia, doula support is not currently funded by Medicare, and it isn’t on the approved service list for Support at Home (the aged care program that replaced Home Care Packages). NDIS funding is only possible in specific circumstances. Budgeting for this as a private expense from the outset avoids awkward surprises later.

Ask about fit: this relationship is personal

Skills and logistics matter, but so does whether this is someone you or your family actually want in the room during your most vulnerable moments.

• Can we have an initial conversation before committing, to see if this feels right?
• How do you hold space for views that differ from your own?
• How do you approach cultural, spiritual or religious practices that matter to us?
• How do you involve family members and carers, and how do you support them, not just the person who is dying?
• Have you supported someone with a similar illness, family situation or cultural background before?

There’s no wrong answer to most of these; the point is to see whether their approach matches what you’re looking for.

A few closing questions worth asking yourself

Before you engage a doula, it can help to reflect on:

• What do we most want support with: practical tasks, emotional presence, planning, or all three?
• Who else is already involved in care, and how would a doula fit alongside them?
• What matters most to us about how the final days unfold?

Getting clear on your own priorities makes it much easier to tell, from the answers you get, which doula is the right match.